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Liking

The sixth and final letter from the ASSCURL acronym for persuading is Liking.

People say, "Yes" to people they like. They look for similarities. People will consider you a friend if you tell them a secret. Start small to make sure it remains a secret.

If there is one thing you learn about liking, remember this. Think about what you dislike about someone and always do the opposite. To detect a dislike you must listen to your feelings. Whenever you get angry, hateful, jealous or whatever negative emotion, think about what caused this feeling. The same is true for positive emotions. If someone makes you feel good, then identify what caused this. Track this in your persuasion notebook.

This takes some practice but the feeling is the key. Keep asking yourself, "Do I do this behavior?" Focus on this technique for a week. Set an alarm or remind yourself to analyze the feeling.

I had a bad habit of criticizing people. Because of my nature as a problem solver, I'm always looking for solutions. Most people don't want you to solve their problem. The funny thing is when someone does ask me for help with a problem, I often don't help them.

The computer code for this is:

Event occurs or message received
What is the feeling?
If positive then copy this
If negative then don't do this

Some elements to liking are covered throughout this book.
When you can get someone to like you they're easier to persuade.

Some methods are:

Compliments especially Subtle Compliments

Never Criticize

Showing interest

Active Listening

Build Rapport through mirroring aka isopraxis

Then there are things you can do to annoy people. This will make it harder to persuade them.

Poor hygene

Making too much noise

Excluding people

Complaining

Interrupting

Talking behind people's back

	40.	Getting someone to open up
	3.	Persuade Like Hitler
	45.	What are feelings like feeling sick (g)
	82.	Strategies to be more likable
	79.	People don't liked to be laughed at
	62.	Ask for a favor - Ask someone who dislikes you for a favor and they will like you
	28.	Yelling
	17.	Small talk
	55.	Warning someone about a behavior that they believe helps them
	32.	Give Credit
	30.	Micro manager
	93.	As the extreme persuader I do a high ground maneuver "If this looks like a meltdown you must be frightened by everything you see
	7.	Mirroring (Isopraxis)
	71.	the stories most likely to make headlines are THE ONES LEAST LIKELY TO BE TRUE
	38.	Don't embarrass your boss in front of their bosscan't work off hours
	21.	You seem like a nice person. What do you think of someone who takes up to much room
	107.	Rules for getting leader to like and promote you
	76.	Law of the Universe: People are 6x more likely to make a deal with someone they like.
	103.	Seeing people more increases liking
	50.	That's a really good idea vs. You're idea sucks
	49.	Noticing a negative behavior and saying "Boy you're lazy" or some other negative
	64.	The facts don�t matter. Facts never matter. What matters is that the �crazy racist� label picked up enough confirmation bias to stick like tar
	13.	Talking behind people's back
	77.	"It sounds like you're emotional about this vs.
	16.	Disliking
	8.	Humor/comedy
	52.	Think before you speak. Will this increase or decrease liking
	56.	I don't like super-hero movies. What if person loves them?
	86.	like cooperation to mutual goals
	34.	People crave praise
	65.	Picture just what your life would be like�if you had thousands of subscribers�on your mailing list.
	51.	Treating smart people like they're stupid
	85.	like getting compliments
	12.	Disagree with someone's idea
	10.	Listening
	18.	Things in common
	4.	steps to persuading like learning to juggle
	54.	6 Brilliant Tools to Make You Look like a Pro Landlord
	22.	isis, persuade like
	90.	Out linear minds do not like nuances and reduce the infomration to the binary "harmful" or "helpful"
	27.	Mocking people
	46.	Spitting while talking (g)
	44.	Humiliation
	104.	we liked being liked
	14.	Criticizing
	89.	Say commands so it doesn't sound like you're bossing people around
	67.	Get your boss to like you better than the other employees on the team
	37.	Taking/Giving credit for others work
	61.	If you're watching on Youtube, hit the like button and subscribe
	11.	Talking too much about yourself
	66.	People don't like being around negative people
	81.	What would it be like if..
	83.	People say yes to those they like
	75.	It's your job to present exactly how you'd like to work togeter and the specific benefit of doing so
	72.	Rather than trying to figure out why you are like that or why you struggle, focus on identifying 3 behaviousrs that could change that problem even if you don't understand why
	59.	Smart people are disliked
	24.	Really! You don't know that?
	63.	Use "very much appreciated" vs. "really appreciated" (sounds like a lie say "really"
	111.	I will vs. I'll probably, I'd like to, I'll take a look, I might, I'll try, I should🔝
	58.	Snarky
	6.	Did you ...
	78.	It sounds like you're passionate about this"
	73.	What is it you struggle with or don't like about yourself?
	47.	What time are we meeting them? 5:30 like you said
	92.	Reciprocation can overcome a dislike for the requestor
	84.	like similar
	110.	13 things I dislike about Olga
	105.	same tribe, acts like us, a relative
	95.	There can't be all this smoke without any fire but the media is creating the smoke as far as I can tell it looks like fake smoke (scratches head)
	74.	You've helped me out so much that I'd like to return the favor. If there's anything you need help with just let me know
	2.	The Like Switch
	53.	You should..
	98.	I have a thought experiment in there about abortion and it goes like this...
	88.	� is how comfortable you are with yourself, most people aren't like that
	1.	The Like switch has a method to determine if someone is lying
	48.	Treating smart people as stupid
	87.	We are Asian.�Like you.�
	31.	Deprival Super Reaction Syndrome
	26.	Talking at too low a level to someone can be insulting
	96.	because China is willing to wait 400 years for something to develop. (talks as if china) I like where this is heading 400 yrs is good enough.
	109.	7 ways to increase tips from like switch
	41.	"I" vs. "you" make sure you're not singing "me, me, me me"
	23.	Trump, persuade like
	15.	Rude
	108.	I call Bill Love Mr. Bill trying to be funny and sense he doesn't like it. I don't like ppl saying beam me up scotty
	60.	Ellen DeGeneres Jokes to get likability
	33.	Embarrassing your boss or co-worker
	94.	Do you consider yourself adventurous and like to try new things
	101.	Meaning all his preferences for policies and the way he'd like the world to be is based on a high level of empathy
	35.	Never delay your boss when asked to do something, Never make them wait I'll be there in 5 minutes... is bad
	29.	Know it all
	25.	Don't make fun of people
	39.	Delays
	42.	No "Hello"
	80.	dress like your audience when giving a speech
	102.	names like dept of defense vs. dept. of war
	9.	Pacing and Leading
	20.	Establish commonalities
	97.	Cause they're always a little bit more mature, doesn't it feel like that consistently more mature"
	100.	I'm saying today if X went away it would look like Y
	99.	So if you're an X and you're trying to decide Y in the old days without an internet you couldn't organize like you can now with social media
	69.	https://www.getabstract.com/en/summary/career-and-self-development/how-to-make-people-like-you-in-90-seconds-or-less/9888?u=bac
	68.	Be likable, friendly, smile
	43.	Pointing outs someones flaws increases their dislike of you
	91.	The rule for reciprocity was so strong that it simply overwhelmed the influence of a factor�liking for the requester�that normally affects the decision to comply.
	36.	I enjoy the taste of something and someone says "that tastes like playdough"
	70.	If you'd like to be added to the waiting list, enter your information below, and you'll be the first to know when we open more seats. -- Ramit
	106.	Nothing drasws a crowd like a crowd
	5.	Compliments (g)
	19.	Boasting
	57.	Try to get someone to dislike you